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DESCRIPTION OF WORKSHOP
This workshop for therapists -TURNING FIGHTS INTO INTIMATE CONVERSATIONS - presents Collaborative Couple Therapy. Its goal is to enable participants to:
1. Become each partner's spokesperson, scriptwriter, and advocate.2. Turn problems into moments of intimacy.
3. Use fights as entry points into conversations that can expand the relationship.
4. Recognize pathological behavior as a default position that people fall back on when they are unable to get themselves across.
5. Bring out what each partner is struggling with in a way that gets everyone empathizing.
6. Find ways to empathize with the less likeable partner.
7. Become more conversant with their self-talk during couple therapy.
8. Deal with couple gridlock by re-assembling the relationship on the next higher level.
9. Recognize the subtle pejorative attitude that can easily creep into our work with clients.
10. Substitute loss of voice for resistance as the key psychopathological concept
The Major Elements of the Workshop:
POSITIONS. In order to do couple therapy you need a position: a way to make sense of the flood of material coming at you and a plan for how to intervene. Dan lists common positions as an introduction to describing his own.
THEORY OF RELATIONSHIPS. Dan uses a fight with his partner to lay out his theory of relationships and the couple therapy approach that emerges out of it.
LIVE DEMONSTRATION WITH VIDEO ANALYSIS. Using volunteers from the audience to role-play the partners, Dan demonstrates his therapeutic approach, followed by a video replay in which he describes the rationale behind each intervention.
THE THERAPIST'S INNER DIALOGUE. Using volunteers from the audience to help him read from a prepared script, Dan describes the conversation he has with himself while doing couple therapy. We see here the hidden tempestuous life of the therapist.
THE SOURCE OF THE PARTNERS' PROBLEM is loss of voice - the inability to express what they feel or even recognize fully what it is. Partners take these feelings that make them uneasy and sweep them under the rug or turn them into something the other is doing wrong - that is, they avoid or blame.
THE TASK OF THERAPY is to turn the couple's avoidant or angry interaction into an intimate conversation by discovering the missing heartfelt feelings and creating a joint platform (re-assembling the relationship on the next higher level).
THE PARTNERS' INNER DIALOGUES. A clue to the partners' missing heartfelt feelings is in their inner dialogues - what they say to themselves while talking to each other. A task of therapy is to bring out these inner dialogues.
SAN FRANCISCO BAY AREA
San Francisco, CA, October 15-16, 2011, Sat and Sun, 10am-5:30pm on each day. You may come for both days worshops or just Saturday's. California Institute of Integral Studies, 1453 Mission Street, San Francisco, CA 94103 http://www.ciis.edu/News_and_Events/Event_Calendar/Wile_Collaborative_Couple_Therapy_FA11.html
OUTSIDE THE BAY AREA.Portland, OR. Trainer is Nan Narboe who has taught with Dan since the 80s, and brings him to Portland two to three times a year. Nan's ongoing CCT training group meets from 1pm to 4pm on the last Friday of the month, September through June. Limited to those who have taken Dan's 6 hour introductory workshop or studied his cd of the workshop. Contact her for information (503-516-5832 or Nan@nannarboe.com ).
Australian Tour 2011. Melbourne (Aug 8-9), Sydney (Aug 12-13), Brisbane (Aug 15-16), Perth (Aug 19-20). For further information and to register: http://www.psychotherapy.com.au/pages/events/wile2011.asp
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These meetings, which are held in three San Francisco Bay Area locations, provide continuing training in Collaborative Couple Therapy. Each meeting lasts three hours and has two parts:
1. Didactic. An aspect of Collaborative Couple Therapy is presented.
2. Case Consultation. Participants who wish to do so present couple cases for consultation. Emphasis will be on the aspect just discussed.
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Schedule
Oakland, California, 9:15am-12:15pm, Saturdays
Jan 21, 2012; Feb 25, 2012; Mar 24, 2012.Sebastopol, California, 2-5pm, Fridays
Jan 27, 2012; Mar 2; 2012; April 6, 2012Palo Alto, California, 9:30am-12:30pm, Saturdays.
Jan 28, 2012, Mar 3, 2012, Apr 21, 2012.
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California MFTs and LCSWs. Apfelbaum-Wile Seminars (AWS) is approved by the Board of Behavioral Sciences to provide continuing education for Marriage and Family Therapists and Licensed Clinical Social Workers (provider #PCE 8). The one-day workshop meets the qualification for 6 CEUs, the two-day workshop for 12, and each continuing training session for 3. At some of the workshops, CEUs will be provided through the host's provider number. Email Dan for particulars.MCEP credit. Email Dan to find out which of the California workshops and continuing training meetings provide MCEP credit, through which sponsoring organization, and whether the course has been approved or just submitted for approval.
TWO-DAY COLLABORATIVE COUPLE THERAPY INTENSIVE
Dan Wile, developer of Collaborative Couple Therapy, has been offering two-day intensives on his approach. Here are the new dates for Autumn, 2011:
Mar 10-11, 2012 (Saturday and Sunday)
May 5-6 , 2012 (Saturday and Sunday)
June 9-10, 2012 (Saturday and Sunday)
These meetings will be held in Oakland , California, enrollment will be limited to 8 people and CEUs will be offered. Dan begins with a role-play demonstration of couple therapy. Then everyone who wishes takes a turn as the therapist. We stop the action at various points in the role plays to discuss what the therapist feels about each partner, the immediate therapeutic problem, and strategies for dealing with it. In between these role plays, Dan describes the underlying theory of his approach, the set of interventions he uses, and his methods for fighting off the powerful temptation to take sides.
During this intensive, you will learn how in your couple therapy work to:
• Help partners find their voice
• Turn fights into intimate conversations
• Create a vantage point above the fray
• Empathize with the less likeable partner
• Appeal to partners as consultants in dealing with the problems that arise in the therapy
Comments by past participants about the intensive
- I enjoyed the opportunity to practice the methods in a small group setting. Dan made the group feel safe and supportive. Everyone was encouraged to participate and build on each other's thoughts.
- A wonderful balance between challenge and support.
- I loved the one-on-one attention Dan gives each participant. It's a “private conversation” that we're all privy to. There is so much learning that is embedded in all aspects of this very thoughtful intensive.
- The intensive will live on in my heart and mind for the rest of my career.
- Dan has a remarkable ability to reflect one partner's concerns while taking those of the other partner into account. He is also an amazingly empathic therapist and I picked up a lot through osmosis.
- The most profound approach I have come across in my 33 years as a psychologist.
- I never knew what time it was and never cared. It was totally engrossing.
To register, please send a check for $450 for the two-day training (or $250 if you are a student or intern) to Dan Wile, 6119 Acacia Avenue, Oakland, CA 94618 . We meet at this address (my home/office). I will email acknowledgement of your registration and information about local hotels ( and bed & breakfasts) and directions how to get here.
REGISTRATION FORM
Name_________________________________________________________________________
Address_____________________________City________________State_________Zip_______
Email________________________________________Phone____________________________
Licensetype_________________License#_______________State_________
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Dates: As I said, the intensive will be offered on the following three occasions:
March 10-11, 2012 (Saturday and Sunday)
May 5-6, 2012 (Saturday and Sunday)
June 9-10, 2012 (Saturday and Sunday)
Please indicate in order of your preference which of these dates you can make :
First choice______________________________________
Second choice (if any)_____________________________
Third choice (if any)_______________________________
Hours on each day:
9am-12pm
12pm-1:30pm lunch (provided)
1:30pm-4:30pm
For more information, contact Dan at 510-654-7390 or dan@danwile.com . For more information about Dan's work, check his website: www.danwile.com
Dan Wile, PhD, ABPP, has had thirty years experience as a couple therapist. He has published on psychotherapeutic theory as well as couples therapy, has taught at several graduate programs in the San Francisco Bay Area, gives professional workshops on couples therapy throughout the United States and internationally, and is author of Couples Therapy: A Nontraditional Approach , After the Honeymoon, How Conflict Can Improve Your Relationship , and After the Fight: Using Your Disagreements to Build a Stronger Relationship .
A revised edition of Dan Wile's After the Honeymoon: How Conflict Can Improve Your Relationship has just been published and is available from Amazon and Barnes & Noble.
In his book, The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work , John Gottman, Ph.D., a leading researcher in marital therapy, writes about Daniel Wile: "I love Wile's writing and thinking. They are entirely consistent with many of my research findings. I think that Wile is a genius and the greatest living marital therapist. I am blessed to have been able to exchange ideas with him."
ACCREDITATION – 12 CE Credits/Hours sponsored by R. Cassidy Seminars.
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